300 million years until Pete gets his lump of coal,

it’s still a mix of gooey plants inside a muddy hole.

200 million years until the big surprise for Pete,

the plants are slowly changing from the pressure, earth, and heat.

100 million years until Pete’s stocking gets a pour,

the coal is underground beneath a roaring dinosaur.

200,000 years until Pete learns if he’s been nice,

the coal is waiting peacefully while mammoths trudge through ice.

One hundred years until Pete’s gift falls out and rolls around,

the lump of coal is mined from deep beneath the rocky ground.

Just fifty years until Pete learns he’s earned a lump of coal,

the lump is put in storage at the planet’s northern pole.

The second Pete receives his coal, he whoops a mighty cheer:

“Wa-Hoo! That Santa read my list!! I’ve been so good this year!”

The minute after Pete’s surprise, he shows his mom and dad.

“This present traveled all through time! Best gift I’ve ever had!”

I leap over fences in one single bound,

to rescue the doggies they keep at the pound.

They're all going free now--from beagle to hound.

Oh, no! Robot guards with their leashes unwound!

Woof, woof, and away! Watch me leaving the ground.

Then, speeding back down to knock evil around!

KA-CLANK, POW, KA-CRASH! No more creeps to be found.

The doggies are free! And they'll be safe and sound.

I built them a house--luxuries to astound.

A whistle goes off if they need me around.

Woof, woof, and away! Time to free the next pound.

Be careful, it’s out here: the terrible Drabbit.

You brought all the trap gear? Okay, let me have it.

This beast is a terror—half dragon, half rabbit.

But, I know it’s weakness: a vegetable habit!

The beast sees a carrot and can’t help but grab it.

It goes for the bait, trips the trap, then we nab it!

You did bring the net, right? What, you don’t have it?!

So, how were you thinking we’d grab it? Dagnabbit!

Hey, what? You’ve got wings now? And ears like a rabbit?

You had a disguise?? Oh no, you’re the Drabbit!!

One pot to rule them all I say!

I’ve built a golden pot.

I spun a bunch of gold from hay

that Rumpelstiltskin brought.

We melted, molded through the day–

and now, a golden pot!

But what makes sense to store this way?

Really, not a lot.

Rumpelstiltskin said he’d stay

until we have a thought.

I’m drowsy—(yawn)—I start to sway.

My brain’s completely shot.

I really wish I had that hay

to make a sleeping spot.

It’s Valentine’s Day! I’ve been waiting all year!

Class gift exchange time and I’ve got your cards here!

They all say, “From Hank” with your names in the blanks.

Take heart candies too. there’s no need to say thanks!

The hearts say, “You’re Special,” “You’re Cool,” or “Be Mine.”

It’s Valentine’s Day! Take a few more, it’s fine!

Aren’t they delicious? Hey Brooke, why that look?

Hey Mark, are you hiding your hearts in that book?

What’s wrong with you, Jake? Do you have a toothache?

Whoops! Grace dropped her hearts in the trash by mistake.

Dawn, watch that window! Oops, more hearts are gone.

Why are you holding your mouth like that, Shaun?

You guys look so grumpy. What’s with this class here?

I’ve been saving these Valentine’s hearts since last year!

The mermaid named Marla loved sports of all sorts.

She swam to resorts that had ball fields and courts.

She hopped up on shore to play tennis and ping-pong.

Then, off to the gym—lifting weights kept her swing strong.

The pins all went flying whenever she bowled.

Her golf trophies filled up a sunken ship’s hold.

But she never made baskets. Her shots went KA-CLUNK.

Until she learned basketball’s mighty slam dunk.

BOOSH!!